Here We Go

Tomorrow is the day that we will potentially be "moving" to Denver. I called the Ronald McDonald House this morning and they told me that they have many rooms available, but due to a stomach flu epidemic at Children's Hospital they are not taking any new residents. They hope that restriction will be lifted tomorrow. While that doesn't sound like the best scenario for us to be walking into, it may actually work in our favor because of there are empty rooms waiting to be filled. I have a fetal monitoring in the morning at McKee and if they are allowing new residents tomorrow and we get a room, we'll head down in the afternoon. It's crazy seeing all of our things packed and getting put in the car. I'm really conflicted about going down to Denver a week early. I want to be there because I'm very scared about going into labor early and it wouldn't be good if I went into labor in Loveland. At the same time, I want to stay home as long as we can. But we can't pass up a room if one is available for us because we will need that room for quite some time. A week from tomorrow, Mia will definitely be in our lives and everything will be forever changed. It's a surreal feeling.

Quickly Approaching

A week from now we will be loading up our car and heading to Denver in anticipation of my delivery. Two weeks from now, my Mia will be here. Everything is happening very quickly now and I'm getting both excited and nervous. I'm so excited to meet my baby girl and see what she looks like. I'm excited to see Izzy's reaction to her baby sister and to see Art hold our daughters together. I'm excited to hopefully be able to hold her myself and feel her little hand in mine. While all of that is in the front of my brain and those are the things I'm trying to focus on, I can't help but think about how different things are going to be this time around. Although I had a c-section with Izzy, I'm nervous about my own surgery. I'm nervous about how long it's going to take for me to recover. I'm nervous about how Mia's heart will look once she is out in the world and, of course, nervous about her first surgery. I'm nervous about how Izzy is going to react to everything that will be going on and about living in an unknown place for more than a month. Everything will be foreign to us. Deep down I am a true believer that everything happens for a reason. I'm still not sure of the reason for all of this. One day I'll know, but for now it's hard. Every part of it is hard. I want the best life possible for my family and I just hope we're doing the right thing. I feel Mia kick inside of me and I wonder what kind of life she'll have down the road. I wonder what kind of life we'll all have. Then I look at my Izzy and hope that we also made the right choice for her. Being a mother is definitely the hardest job there is, no one will ever be able to convince me otherwise.