"The only sure thing about luck is that it will change."

We have a few digital picture frames in our home.  One of them actually plays on our TV when we're not watching it.  I've seen all the pictures on it a hundred times, but as I walked by tonight, I saw this picture of Mia.

That is a picture taken probably within an hour after she got out of her first open heart surgery, when she was 3 days old.  As this picture was up on the screen, I thought about Mia's upcoming surgery.  We still don't know when specifically it will be, but it will happen.  No matter when, it will happen.  We have a doctor's appointment at Children's this Friday, hopefully the final appointment before her cath in May.

All of these thoughts were going through my head in the few seconds that this picture was on the screen.  My initial thought was, there's my baby girl, I love her so much.  Sometimes I honestly look at this picture and I don't even notice the massive breathing tube down her nose, or the wide bandage covering her beautiful chest scar.  I just see my little girl.  When my eyes do notice the medical devices keeping her alive on that day, I think ahead to seeing her like that again, as a toddler.  Then I usually have thoughts of fear, but I didn't today.  I think that had a lot to do with two of my very good friends.

I looked at this picture today and I thought about how truly lucky I am to have this little girl in my life.  Sometimes I tend to think too much about how unfair it is that Mia has half a heart or how drastically our lives have changed since the day we got her diagnosis and I forget to remind myself that no matter those things, I have a beautiful daughter.  As I told one of my friends today, we can't concentrate so much on what we don't have, we have to remind ourselves of what we do!  Which then led me to think about another conversation that I had recently about miracles.  Mia is my miracle.  So is Izzy for that matter.  Just stop and think about what it actually takes to make a child, and you'll realize that every single living, breathing child is a miracle.  In addition to that, it's a miracle in my eyes that Mia has overcome what she has.  It's a miracle the medical advances are what they are today.  Every day I spend with both of my daughters is a miracle and I'm so lucky to have them in my life. Thank you Nicole & Cristin for helping me to remember that!